Bird of the Week

Bird 74 – Mandarin Duck

Is it time to do a duck? I think it’s time to do a duck. But let’s not do any old duck, let’s do the fanciest duck there is. Let’s do the Mandarin Duck (Aix galericulata)

It’s Latin name is quite fun, as it literally translates as diving wig.

In Korea they are know as wedding ducks. They mate for life, so at Korean weddings couples are given a pair of carved wooden ducks, symbolising romance or something…

Image result for mandarin duck korean wedding

Now you don’t need me to tell you that the most striking thing about this bird is its plumage. Just take a look at that handsome son of a duck!

When feathers were getting handed out the Mandarin Duck said, ‘I’ll take one of everything … and also sails for my wings. I float on the water, right? I’m a little boat.’
The female, as is usually the case, is a lot less impressive.

Which actually raises a question. Why do birds have such pointed physical differences between males and females? And why don’t you see it so much with other animals?
It all has do with genes. You see, birds don’t muck around with XY chromosomes like we do. They have ZW chromosomes. And this could get super complicated (but it’s also super fascinating because in some cases birds can change sex; I’ll revisit later) but for now, I’ll give the abridged version:

In mammals the Y chromosomes, which determines male sex, is very small. Whereas in birds the Z chromosome is huge. This means there are thousands of extra genes where mutations can happen that only get passed to the male of the species. Essentially, male birds can develop a whole bunch of crazy attributes in a relatively short amount of time, compared to other animals. Mostly, all of them based on what the ladies find sexy, as apposed to being of any particle use. Typical useless male: Exhibit A, the Peacock.

Image result for peacock — So useless, yet so beautiful

But the long and the short of all them genes is we get birds that look like this crazy chap.

And I think we can all agree, the world is a more colourful place for it.

Thank you abnormally large Z chromosome.

28/04/2019

Bird 73 – Sun Conure

So back when we did the Bird of the Year, there was a small controversy. One of you maverick subscribers felt the California Quail was not a worthy winner.

But I mean, seriously, have you ever seen it?

It’s a Quail from California, enough said.

Instead the suggestion (outrageous) was made that the Sun Conure (Aratinga solstitialis) should have been the winner.

Now, don’t get me wrong, it’s a nice bird. Not Bird of the Year worthy, but certainly worthy of its own week. So here it is now. And aside from looking like a tropic cocktail, what else have these guys got going on?

Like all good tropical cocktails, they come from the tropics. They’re a parrot native to the forests of South America. In the wild they form into large flocks, which they almost never leave throughout their lives. If they ever get separated they make a high pitched scream as a way to locate their buddies and find their way home. However, they’ve also become very popular as pets.

They became popular due to their very affectionate nature towards people, once they’ve been hand raised. However, they have draw backs. Namely that high pitched scream I mentioned. They have one of the loudest screams by ratio to size, so that’s a thing.
And while they are quite affectionate with people they know, they can be super territorial and aggressive towards people they don’t know. So they’re a bit like an annoying dog that yaps at anyone who walks past your house.

But really that’s what you want in a pet: something that will be loyal and loving to you and only you, and will willingly knife anyone who crosses you. How else are we supposed to build up a bird army?

This one is also super lurky…

As a candidate for bird army I rate them a solid 6: easily trainable, totally loyal and aggressive, but probably not as lethal as something cool like an eagle.

PS: Didn’t have a special bird for Easter, but don’t worry, I’ve got big plans for the most important holiday of the year. That’s right, get prepared for Bastille Day!

21/04/2019

Bird 72 – Victoria Crowned Pigeon

That mention of Pigeons at the end of last week made me realise I can’t remember the last time we did a good columbiforme.

Actually, I lie, I know exactly when we last did a pigeon, it was Bird of the Week 61. I mean … I don’t keep a list. Stop asking about the list.

Now, I know you all like a fancy pigeon, well this is a very fancy pigeon. The Victoria Crowned Pigeon (Goura Victoria)

Image result for victoria crowned pigeon

This is a forest dwelling pigeon from New Guinea, named after Queen Victoria, and rightly so I should think. For if ever there was a queen to rule all pigeondom this is surly the one for the job.

It’s a QUEEEEEEEEEENNNNNN!!!

Look at that crown! So regal.

And here’s one being all like, oh heyyy, didn’t see you there.

So coy!

It’s actually the largest living pigeon getting around. Somewhat rare in the wild, it is however commonly kept in aviaries, for reasons that are too obvious and numerous to point out. I mean, just look at it:

Pigeon!!

14/04/2019

Bird 71 – Flamingos

Ok, this week I’m going to answer a question I know all of you have asked at some point. What is the deal with Flamingos? I mean look at the damn thing:

It’s 90% leg and neck, pink to boot, and that beak does not look right… you know what I’m saying.

Lets cut to the chase. Despite appearances they are not related to Strokes or really any other water bird (except Grebes, go figure). They belong in their own taxonomic order, Phoenicopteridae, of which there are six species, two that live in Africa and Asia, and four that live in South America. Funnily enough, one of their closest living relatives are the pigeons. Why is that? Don’t worry, we’ll come back to it.

First though, their colour. Flamingos are born grey, and become the classic pink by eating bacteria rich in carotene. The better fed a Flamingo the brighter its plumage.

The same thing can happen to people, eat too many carrots your skin goes orange.

I’d say that’s probably what happened to Trump, but I’m pretty sure he’s never eaten a vegetable, so that’s another little mystery for the ages.

Speaking of mysteries for the ages: that classic Flamingo stance, where they stand on one leg.

Yeah, that one. No one knows why they do it. First it was thought it kept their body temperature up if they were standing in cold water, but they do it no matter what the temperature is so… I guess they just like standing on one leg.

Now, finally Flamingos are also one of only three birds that lactate.

You heard me.

They feed their chicks a little something called crop milk, which they secrete from their crop (it’s the upper part of their digestive track). And delightfully, Flamingo milk is also blood red in colour.

It’s how their babies get the carotene they need to turn pink.

Now, you’re wondering, what are the other two birds that produce milk. Well one is the male Emperor Penguin, and the other is everyone’s favourite bird, the Pigeon.

Such a dramatic bird.

Until next week my fine feathered friends.

06/04/2019

Fish 70 – Flying Fish

We’ve been at this game for a while now. We’ve covered everything from the Great White to the Clown. But this week we’re going to do something a little different.

It’s said you should never judge a fish by it’s ability to climb a tree. But maybe, just maybe, we should judge a fish by it’s ability to fly. Introducing the Flying Fish.

Flying Fish | National Wildlife Federation

This fish really blurs the line between what constitutes a fish and what constitutes a bird. In fact, many scientists believe they are the missing link between birds and fish. A hold over from the time when our salty brethren first turned their tails on the ocean and took their first tentative flaps into the sky.*

In perfect conditions they have been known to cover an aerial distance of up to 400 metres, and can get a maximum altitude of about 6 metres, which isn’t too shabby. They can even travel up to 70 Km/h in the air.

Primarily they use it as a tactic to escape predators. Hard for a fish to eat you when you’re not in the water.

Image result for flying fish run on water

Fish is where it’s at, yo. Everyone knows life is the bubbles under the sea! Why would anyone waste their time dreaming about leaving the sea, or writing about birds? That would be weird… and this is a normal email service.

Until next week, I wish you a joyous First of April.

01/04/2019

*Almost certainly not a real fact.

Bird 69 – Abbott’s Booby

Ah Bird of the Week 69, it’s a number we were always going to get to. And I know what a lot of you are thinking right now, and I just want to say, you’re all filthy. This is an innocent email service about birds, pigeons, plumage and murder. So I’m going to give you the least sexiest thing the bird world has to offer.

And to do so I need a little help from a former Bird of the Week guest star. Your friend and mine, Tony Abbott, so that I can introduce you to Abbott’s Booby.

Abbott’s Booby is traditionally found on the upper right hand side of Tony Abbott’s chest. It is rumoured there is another that lives on the left hand side, but no firm evidence has yet come to light that it exists, which is a shame because without the left wing he has been rendered completely flightless.

A place long associated with Abbott and his various right wing boob policies is Christmas Island. But there’s another Booby besides Abbott’s Booby that’s associated with Christmas Island, and that’s Abbott’s Booby (Papasula abbotti).

Boobys belong to the order Suliformes, along with Gannets, and they’re a seagoing bird. They were actually named for the American naturalist, William Louis Abbott, who was the first person to collect a specimen. Abbott actually has three other birds named after him too, so who knows, you may be seeing his name again.

Abbott’s Booby, though, is the rarest Booby on earth, as it only lives on Christmas Island. There’s only about 3,000 of the little guys left, and the future doesn’t look too bright for them.

Image result for abbott's booby — So graceful.

People are worried that the yellow crazy ant that got onto the island a few years back could pose a threat, so efforts are being made to try to knock out the ants. And then of course there’s that old chestnut, climate change… Really, I don’t feel like Abbott has done a lot to help out his namesake bird.

Hang in there, little future Boobys, I know you can make it.

23/03/2019

Bird 68 – Lyall’s Wren

We’ve done extinct birds before, but this week I’ve got an interesting story. An entire species of bird wiped out by a single cat, named Tibbles.

Lyall’s Wren (Traversia Lyalli), was a small flightless wren native to Stephen’s island, which is located between the North and South Island of New Zealand.

In 1894 several peopled moved to the island to crew its lighthouse. Among them was a chap named David Lyall, who brought a pet cat named Tibbles with him.

Not long after arriving on the island, Tibbles brought home a dead bird she had caught. Lyall, was a bit of an amateur naturalist and was intrigued by a bird he’d never seen before. So he sent the specimen off to be identified. Turned out Tibbles had discovered a new species of hitherto unidentified bird. Scientists around the world were soon excited to learn more about this rare bird.

In the meantime, though, it turned out Tibbles had been pregnant when she came to the island, and now she and her kittens were running a muck, killing more birds in the process. Being flightless and fearless also made them super easy to catch.

The long and the short of it is that within 12 months of its discovery, Lyall’s Wren was extinct. Wiped out by Tibbles and her children.

They were killed so quickly it’s believed they were only ever seen alive in the wild twice and so today we know virtually nothing about them, except that they were flightless and maybe nocturnal.

And that’s the story of Lyall’s Wren.

It’s rare for a bird to be so totally destroyed by one cat, but make no mistakes, collectively cats do a grand job. Cats kill more than 316 million birds in Australia every year. That’s nearly a million a day. So if you have a cat, please keep them inside and away from the birds.

We don’t want another Lyall’s Wren on our hands.

17/03/2019

Bird 67 – Wedge-tailed Eagle

Last week’s talk of Jurassic Park reminded me that we haven’t had a really good murder bird for a while. And you know me, I love a bird that loves to kill. So let’s go with an Australian classic, a raptor if you will: The Wedge-tailed Eagle (Aquila audax)

Now, these are some badass birds. Females can weigh nearly 6Kg, with a wing span of over two metres. So yeah, they’re big. And let me tell you, they are not picky about what they kill. Here’s a short list of their common prey:

rabbits
foxes
wallabies
small kangaroos
possums
kolas
bandicoots
cockatoos
bush turkeys
ducks
crows
ibises
young emu
goannas
brown snakes
sheep

Goats are a bit big for them, but if they’re able to chase them off a cliff they’ll totally do that too. So yeah, if it moves they’ll kill it.

Here’s also a picture of one trying to make off with a human child:

Image result for wedge tailed eagle attacks child

The Wedge-tail is also super territorial. So much so, they have been known to attack and take down drones.

The Dutch have even started training eagles to take down unauthorised drones. Which is a move I support, we need more eagles attacking things. I see no down side.

Image result for xkcd eagle attacks drone

10/03/2019

Bird 66 – Huia

People sometimes ask how I find my birds. Am I doing research? … No, not really; they tend to fall in my lap. Prime example: couple of weeks ago I was watching Hunt for the Wilderpeople (2016). For anyone that hasn’t seen it, I’d recommend, and best describe it as a movie where Sam Neill reprises his role from Jurassic Park, as a reluctant father figure who helps a child through the wilderness. It’s basically the same movie.

And, just like in Jurassic Park, there are extinct animals running (flying) around. I mean, they’re a little less murder-y (which is always a let down) but hey, you take what you can get, am I right?

Midway through the film, Sam spots a bird, which he says had been supposedly extinct for decades. That bird: the Huia (Hecteralocha acutirostris)

Originally native to New Zealand, there hasn’t been a confirmed sighting since 1907, although there were unconfirmed sightings as late as the 1960s.

The reason for their extinction: people. It’s always people. Usual culprit, deforestation. But there was a secondary reason. You see, the Huia has a very interesting trait.

Take a look at the above picture of a male and female pair, and you’ll see they have very different beaks. The female’s is long and curved, while the male has a short stubby one. While we see plenty of sexual dimorphism in birds’ feathers, this is the only bird where it presented in the shape of their beak. At least to this extreme extent.

And it was because of this strange trait that they become one of the most prized species for collectors, taxidermists and museums around the world. People would pay top dollar for a mounted pair to put on display. As a result, the hunting trade in New Zealand boomed, and that, coupled with habitat loss, basically meant the bird was all but extinct by the beginning of the twentieth century. They were also hunted as their feathers were traditionally used in Maori headdresses.

Because of this added cultural significance, they also hold the distinction of being the most expensive feathers ever sold. This one sold for NZ$8,000.

So yeah, they’re gone, but don’t worry folks, Sam Neill totally saw one is going to track that bird down. I believe!

03/03/2019

Bird 65 – Blood Pheasant

I’m sure you, like me, have seen all the recent signs that have plagued our world. Those that tell of a creeping doom soon to be upon us. Blood weeping from the walls, locus swarming, planes falling from the sky, dogs and cats living together, mass hysteria. It can mean only one thing: The coming of the Blood Pheasant (Ithaginis cruentus)

This is a bird with nothing but malice in its heart.

To the ancients it was known as The Devourer of Worlds. People would construct blood stone circles, wear soft meat crowns, and perform sacrifices to its greater glory in the hope their meaningless lives might be spared.

Academics still argue to this day as to the rituals’ effectiveness. In truth, the Blood Pheasant is a capricious and changeable tyrant. Mild one moment, tempestuous the next, treacherous as the sea, fair as the sun. All who lay eyes upon its visage cannot help but love it and despair.

People would plead for mercy, but in the Blood Pheasant’s eyes they would find no mercy. It has lifeless eyes, black eyes, like a doll’s eyes. When it comes at you it doesn’t even seem to be alive.

For indeed, it is the eternal bird, the celestial bird. “Behold,” sayeth the Pheasant, “I am the alpha and the omega, the first and the last, the beginning and the end. And I will give to each person according to what they have done.”

To our knowledge that has always been death. The end is nigh, people!

And I for one welcome our new bird overlords.

PS — a prize to anyone who identifies every cultural reference.*

24/02/2019

* Spoilers.

Dogs and cats living together, mass hysteria — Ghostbusters
Devourer of Worlds — Marvel Galactus
Blood stone circles, soft meat crowns — Welcome to Nightvale
Treacherous as the sea… — Lord of the Rings
Lifeless eyes, black eyes, like a doll’s eyes — Jaws
I am the alpha and the omega… — The Bible, Revelations
I for one welcome our new bird overlords — The Simpsons